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Give the unicorns tripod mounted flesh lights hooked up to milking machines. They can do it themselves.
But then somebody would need to maintain the unicorn fleshlights and milking machines. There is no solution!
Stonehedge-
But then somebody would need to maintain the unicorn fleshlights and milking machines. There is no solution!
This is in fact the government's level up policy! You no longer have to wank off unicorns as you'll be higher skilled and can maintain the machines instead... You know, empty them when they're full and clean them out, etc
Velocio
But where will we find a regular supply of low wage workers willing to wank off unicorns? Someone in the supply chain has to be low wage...