Overheard at the LFGSS golf club bar

On fire

Want to teach at Eton? One term a year at the worst sink estate comprehensive in the UK teaching those kids to aspire, dream, work hard and give them a real chance to direct their own fate and succeed in life.

They've probably not got the right qualifications.

Indeed. I also suspect that kids, at whatever school, benefit from having the same teachers throughout a year.

@umop3pisdn this has to be you right?

I rather liked the gauche affair to be honest

I’ve just finished the home wellness suite

Gold

Most people just call it a wankstation

In all seriousness (apologies), what is that? A extra roll of toilet paper?

Edit to add.. loo roll

The restaurant in this rural and provincial Northumberland hotel has gone quite spectacularly golf club due to the table next door. Highlight of the evening so far is "So, my father's best mate is Ken Clarke...". I think the Dirty Reiver may be a factor. I can't imagine they're regulars.

are you sitting next to user amey

You might be surprised, there's plenty of red trouser tweed blazer types in Northumberland.

Edit to add that I hope you enjoy your (presumably) visit, it's a beautiful place despite all the tories.

Very true, used to spend a lot of time around Hexham, ex-wife is from up there, and at the time it was said to have the highest concentration of millionaires in the UK... Swivel-eyed tories EVERYWHERE!!

Aye, someone's gotta own all that land! The working classes in more rural Northumberland tend to vote Conservative too, so they really are everywhere

Just to check is owning three bromptons worthy of the thread?

Or is it just like owning three bikes with the same frame just different set ups, in which case I should STFU.

You might be surprised, there's plenty of red trouser tweed blazer types in Northumberland.

Definitely not locals. Only there for the cycling, ironically enough. MTBing, I think.

Edit to add that I hope you enjoy your (presumably) visit, it's a beautiful place despite all the tories.

All good so far. Did the Dirty Reiver 200 today. Only mildly crippled

Very true, used to spend a lot of time around Hexham

I'm in Bellingham AKA Bell Ing Jam. Really quite close to Hexhsm.

Swivel-eyed tories EVERYWHERE!!

They moved on to explaining why they didn't have live-in domestic staff. Although one did say he wouldn't mind the extra help while entertaining at the weekend.

And it's not like I was being nosey eavesdropping. I suspect most of the parish heard, if not the county.

Well, surely they can have their domestics without staff assistance?

All good so far. Did the Dirty Reiver 200 today. Only mildly crippled

Fucking hell well done, it's a really tough ride that one!

I know Bellingham well... Ex-mother-in-law was the postmistress in a small village near Chollerford... One Christmas the local 'Squire' gave her a brace of pheasant, she didn't have a clue what to do with them... Cue me, Mister City Boy rock'n'roll weirdo, plucking and dressing them ready for her freezer in no time flat, gave me a lot of satisfaction as she was a terrible Hyacinth Bucket type and thought her daughter could've done much better... Which I couldn't argue with, obvs...

The Military Road up there is one of my favourite places on the planet, absolutely fucking beautiful... Treacherous in winter, mind... Woke up one Christmas holiday and couldn't feel the top of my head, it was actually sore it was so cold... And this is when I still had hair, wearing a woolly hat to bed seems a bit over the top to me but I can see how it might be appropriate on some occasions...

I always thought you were a pheasant plucker.

#inb4schick

Wahey!! Etc... 😋

I'm up in those parts. Did a 28 mile charity walk along Hadrian's Wall yesterday with ms mashton's work. We're staying in the YHA at Once Brewed.

My feet now resemble shredded Peking duck.

My feet now resemble shredded Peking duck.

this post is useless without a pic