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I use a G clamp. The cotter pin nut is loosened to use as a surface to clamp against and a larger nut is placed over the pin on other side. The spanner handle was used to create extra leverage.
They sometimes take a while to pop loose. I've often given up and walked away leaving the G clamp applying pressure and then heard a crack a few minutes later.
See photo for my cotter removal process. It's a solid speaker stand with a socket large enough for the cotter to fall through. Same process on both sides.
Basically this way the stand and socket take the strain not the axle.
There is probably an official tool and technique for cotter removal but I found this to be pretty reliable.