Does anyone know anything about gardening?

I saw some similar headlines but haven't read up on it yet.

It's a concrete alley so it would be in a planter.

Ideally I'd like Clematis, Jasmin and varagated(sp?) ivy. But that would take ages.

https://www.gardenersworld.com/plants/clematis-armandii/

This suggestion from that article sounds perfect if every single one of the growing requirements was reversed.

That said it might grow on the west facing bit of our terrace.