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OK. I think your best bet is find somewhere local that installs split units. Choose the room or rooms you want to be hot and cold. Then get a quote.
Or, get a small unit from Argos. Make sure the pipe goes out of a window to dump the heat, keep emptying the condensate water and get used to the noise.
No. You can't buy the units or gas to fill them without the paperwork. And anyone who tells you they can is a cowboy.
And as you need pipework and a separate electric supply that will need punching through walls I'm not sure how you can hide the work.