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  • We had so many fucked up psychotic teachers. I was at secondary school from 1980 onwards, and really nothing much had moved on since the post war period. They all seemed so damaged!

    We had a teacher Mr Smith who used to launch the board rubber at people, regularly used to bounce it off the back of people's skulls.

    Mr Williams, history teacher, had a false glass eye which he used to take out and put on the shoulder of girls and tell them with glee he 'had his eye on them'.

    Another whose name escapes me taught Maths. Alcoholic pill popper, used to fall asleep in the class. Regularly went on mad rages at people, inches from their face. Spittle flying everywhere. He scared me silly. My Mum complained to the school because she figured out I always wanted to be off sick whenever I had his class. I can't remember if he got the boot or not, I think I got moved to another class perhaps. He terrified me.

    Miss Smith my English teacher however was amazing. She used to give me 'under the counter' stuff.....not on the curriculum. Here she'd say, read this you'll like it. Sixties beat poetry and stuff, Adrian Henri and Roger McGough etc. Loved her so much.

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