I hate

Oreos are shit bourbons.

And bourbons are shit custard creams
And custard creams are shit.

I can't argue with any of this

So right. Can't touch a custard cream since somebody told me the innards are mostly lard. Don't know if that's true but it's got enough very believableness to put me off.

Aside from chobnobs bourbons are the world's best biscuit.

Tell me, what way is there to get more enjoyment for 20p or whatever than a pack of bourbons? Nothing, it's economically and mathematically unpossible .

Bourbons are the best, I'd rather die than not eat them.