Owning your own home

Although I think I have featured in that thread so whateva

I would never recommend it! And I'm not playing devil's advocate. Clearly lots of people do it and a scan of the sour faces on this commuter train suggest that lots of people regret it.

Sorry to hear your dad was miserable in work and commute and was therefore distant. Sounds like you have arranged your life in a way that suits you perfectly and for that you should be applauded and not challenged. But not everyone can manage this, so they/we compromise. That's all I meant to say.

It's really hard to make generalisations on this stuff, but I do kind of agree with you. Although it does very much depend on your kids and where you are. Are they going to build BMX jumps or sit in the woods and do Ket?

My dad worked long hours and had a commute out of London. He hated London and desperately wanted to move out so he'd have space at the weekend to build motorbikes, cars etc. as he had no free time in the week. But since retirement he fucking loves being in London and it has undoubtedly given him a higher quality of life.

Why not both?

I wish I had grown up here, took me until university to find it unfortunately

Makes sense. Still aligns with my ethos of choose the location that you want. If you want to live in the countryside and can work remotely or locally, then it's great. If you still have to schlep to the city, I don't think it's worth it.

Personally, if my current social situation in Norwich disappeared I'd probably move to Edinburgh, but that's indicative of my extroversion and desire for noise, people-watching and filter coffee I don't have to make for myself

Always interesting to observe that some people have babies and still socialise a lot but others have a baby and swear that their social lives have ended for good.

So much depends on how your situation plays out.

A mate had their baby in the summer who was particularly easy, and all our friends lived near each other a the time. This meant they could just walk to a local (which was local to everyone else) and hang out with a sleeping baby that periodically needed to be fed and changed.

Conversely ours had sever cholic for the first 4 months and cried almost solidly if awake. It's hard to practically go places in that situation - even before get to the mental health side - then when you do it involves one of you going off to a corner to rock the baby until either they sleep or you go home. Once that passed they were super active and frustrated, so again going anywhere necessitated stimulation which made engaging with the people you're with impossible.

We'd always planned to be relaxed parents using routines only as a rough framework. Unfortunately it's turned our that Hugo2.0 is a happier more manageable baby with a fairly rigid regime.

cried almost solidly if awake

Once that passed they were super active

Feels

He's cool now tho

Ahhhh man, it was a magical time. The scene was pretty small and close nit and there wasn't any of the Skate vs BMX crap you got elsewhere where scenes were bigger. Still produced some great Skaters and riders though.
Norwich Skatepark (Urban Flight) was one of the best n the country at the time, just my luck it opened the year I moved away.
We also always had trails (jumps).
And the shit you could get away with doing because it was the country side was always a bonus...

But not everyone can manage this, so they/we compromise

I getchu, but I feel people mostly comprimise the wrong way. There's a whole country of societal issues and financial weirdness at blame for this though.

Yeah, we've all been there.

Oh, oh hold on, you mean...

Yeah. It turned out to be a protein allergy/intolerance so once we removed milk and soya we had a different child.

Walking has also been a game changer as their constant frustration has largely disappeared.

Surely the cross rail would help here as it connects to Heathrow, central London and reading. Sure you’ve looked at this but I was speaking to cousin who lives in windsor and had forgotten how good useful it will be (if) it gets built

On a different subject... mortgages... mines up... looking at fixed term (as I always like to play it safe), unsure how long that term should be though (2-7 year options).
Anyone smarter than me with recommendations? Anyone switched recently?

You should move to Slough.

^^ Still shitting it at the prospect of switching ours next summer with changing income since baby cyoa / mrs cyoa stopped working. Seeing as we've still made all payments without hitch presume they can't just say 'well you're earning less so you can't have it any more'? My concern is the gordon gecko in them will say 'sure you can have it but at 3000000pc' rendering it unaffordable/miss payments etc.

Peg it to LIBOR and cross your fingers

Still shitting it at the prospect of switching ours next summer with changing income

I'd have thought picking a new deal with your existing provider will avoid most of the hassle.

Go 10 year fixed, just because thats 10 times more than you rode fixed

This, just look for the best deal on the high street and get your bank to match it... Less hassle, less fees and you don't have to disclose your change of circumstances, right?

I hate you.

Personally, if you have no intention of moving and you're currently in a good LTV band, I'd fix for a long time. Rates aren't going to get much lower than they are now but there's always a chance of something going tits up (possibly even more chance of that than not going tits up at the moment) and a hefty increase.

A friend of mine has been in a similar situation a couple of times and I believe they just lied, and all was fine.
IIRC they went on a big holiday after quitting DayZ and came back without jobs to find their mortgage was up. Due ot being higher risk (no jobs) it looked like they were going to have a higher interest rate and therefor pay more (huh?) but they just ticked the "yeah all the same thanks" box on the mortgage and saved themselves 100s a month.
Thats what they told me anyway. No personal experience.

Cheers, yeah not moving ever again.
Think thats the mentality we've had over the last 8 years but only ever went 2 year, now thinking going big and going home.