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@lookitsluke
...I'd not actually entertained this thought until the mention of policing the border further up.
What happens if the UK allows no deal to go through, then buries it's head entirely - think full blown toddler tantrum?
All of the no-deal scenarios seem to be built vaguely on some level of co-operation, or having a vague notion of which direction to point the ship. Something that seems to be lacking a tad (assuming you aren't betting against the pound / looking to make a few bob in the sale of public services...).