Bike Anti-Porn - When Things Go Wrong

1. In naïve, or pure, Anti, the essential element is seriousness, a seriousness that fails
   

And here is a fine example:

Let me count the ways:

1. A meticulous pastiche of Eddy Merckx paint, which should never have been attempted
   
2. MTB pedals on a road bike. We all do it, it's fine for practical purposes, but it's also an aesthetic abomination
   
3. Saddle is just wrong. OK, if your arse likes them, go for it, but don't photograph your post-1970 bike with one unless it also has mudguards and panniers.
   
4. Seatpost is too late for the rest of the retro-fakery. Decide which decade you're trying to recreate and stick to it. The same goes for the brakes.