Unless you do what a mate did, and build the foundation at the end of the garden, and cantilever the wall on a massive RSJ.
Thats crackers!
Foundations might just be within 3m, by about 1-2cm, so I guess technically she will need notice served, surveyors didn't mention that.
The 3m rule refers to the excavation. The 6m rule takes an intersection at 45 degrees from the bottom of their foundation.
See diagrams on pages 20/21 here:
https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/government/uploads/system/uploads/attachment_data/file/523010/Party_Wall_etc__Act_1996_-_Explanatory_Booklet.pdf
I'd be slightly concerned at the advice your surveyors are providing. Are they RICS?
@chrisbmx116 started
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Unless you do what a mate did, and build the foundation at the end of the garden, and cantilever the wall on a massive RSJ.