I hate

Then how do the fairies come into it?

How come the Devil has all the best ........ snot?

Thank you! That’s exactly where I am with this. His ghostly parlour makes feel queasy. He looks like a middle aged 13 year old throwing a whitey after too much hash.

Last night, I got absurdly angry about the fact that in a clip of a random band using his much lauded and fucking stupid “record straight to acetate” facility; the piano player was playing a Nord electric piano. I mean... what’s the fucking point?

Motorcyclists using hazard lights when filtering on the motorway. Why?

Bit late, but in some countries (France for e.g.) it is a requirement. TBH I've always thought it is a really good idea.

Nord electric piano
well yes.
Fender Rhodes right?

I say Gesundheit, you may queue up to fight me.

i find a loud "SHHHHHH." is a great response to anti-social sneezers.

srsly.

zzzzzip.

Hazards are only for stationary vehicles.

I thought they were to warn road users around you of a hazard on the road, whether that is yourself or something else on the road.
Stationary or not

Can be used when moving on a motorway or 70 mph dual carriageway to warn of danger ahead. Not when you’re filtering on a motorcycle

Or braking hard? Pretty sure I had a hire car when they came on while I hit the anchors on a motorway?

All this confuses their real use, for when someone lets you into a queue ahead of them and you don't have the time to give them a wave.

I didn't know that, I always thought they were for when some lazy bastard couldn't be bothered walking more than 3 seconds so had parked in a stupid place.

All this confuses their real use, for when someone lets you into a queue ahead of them and you don't have the time to give them a wave.

Or to allow any vehile to park on double yellow lines while the driver getting 20 Rothmans and a copy of Razzle from the newsagent.

Or allow any vehicle to park on the school zone zigzags whilst dropping their children off at that very school.

Nah. The lights are there cos they are indicators and the switch is there to fill the hole on the dash.

More fine examples of hazard light cuntishness which has got to stop!

Duplicity

Not winning something you thought you'd win cheap on ebay.

Especially when afterwards you realise that it was exactly what you were after.

And usually it goes for a quid or two more than your max bid

Yeah, but generally someone's probably bid a proper price. It only goes up in £1's.

Yes, but at the time it always feels like you’ve missed out by pennies

The optimal eBay strategy is to put the maximum you'd be prepared to pay for the item as close to the deadline as possible.

If it goes for more than that then it went for more you were prepared to pay for it, otherwise you should win it and pay up to the limit of what you were prepared to pay.

eBay relies upon people getting sucked in to bidding more for an item to avoid losing the auction, even if this means people end up paying more than they wanted to. By placing a bid any earlier than the last few seconds you risk the chance of being sucked into an unnecessary bidding war.

By placing a bid any earlier than the last few seconds you risk the chance of being sucked into an unnecessary bidding war.

And you tip people off that there is more interest in the item. They might up their max bid in order not to lose it, which they might not have done if it doesn't look like there's that many people interested in it. Basically, there's nothing to gain by 'showing your hand', so to speak.