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Whether I'm racing or not is not relevant to this issue. It's about keeping to what you agreed and being a reliable trader.
Today, I met someone who had previously agreed to buy my wheels. We agreed a time and a place. He was there on time and the transaction was carried out. If I hadn't have turned up, I would fully deserve to take my place on this part of the forum.
At the end of the day, this is about common decency and treating people as you would expect to be treated yourself ... which certainly hasn't occurred in this instance.
Probably best to move on now.
Its all in the detail of the as yet still private conversations between the two of you. As others have said - Dibs alone can just be annoying when your trying to sell something.
My take - if you're buying carbon wheels for racing but don't have the cash flow to buy one set before off-loading your current ones you probably shouldn't be racing on carbon wheels.