Sort-of memes that are cracking you up at the moment

Friday plans?

Assram's in town - has he got intouch with you?

welcome back home btw.

where the fuck is joe?

Yeah, he has. That's what I was referring to. You filthy fucks.

I'll be back in about 7 hours...

convince him to go to bf's. otherwise we'll end up at that ivy dickpalace.

As a yoof I used to work weekends in B&Q for beer tokens. We had a "customer" who took a crimp in one of the bathroom display toilets. It was a colossal coil so I assume he (I think its safe to also assume it was a bloke) was desparate.

I worked weekends at B&Q as well, and we had a ‘Phantom Shitter’ who would regularly defile the display toilets.

Is this referencing a Manic St Preachers lyric?

Genuine question

Yes

Ahhhhhhh....

was his name radar?

I was garden centre troglodyte, we were outside lifting bales of compost in the pissing rain. Shitting in a fancy display toilet wasn’t for the likes of us.

I bet if their name was spelled backwards it would be radar!

Nope, way off the mark.

not going to the fucken ivy

blackest of friars

Haha. Putting out pallets of 48kg bags of cement was also "fun". Weight issues aside the strongly alkaline cement dust used to block the pores of your skin. Although the mulchy ooze from a growbag wasn't much lols either.

Oh and the lack of water in the display toilets meant the deposits stunk to high heaven. And I think ours might have been a repeat offender too.

That was my first job too. Troglodyte, not phantom shitter

Had a green gingham shirt, clip-on brown tie and kinda cool green donkey jacket. After that I graduated to working IN the giant storage freezer in the Tesco warehouse next door. You had to wear a giant padded onesie and orange rubber fur lined gloves to shift the cages about. We’d just go in there and hang out eating ice cream safe in the knowledge no manager was coming in.

^ you in town on friday, chuckletits?

https://mobile.twitter.com/vonstrenginho/status/1100058029368721408

It’s ok to stand by your dad joke you know. No shame in it :)

Morrissey's End Credits Song from "Green Book"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-_96bgvIDlM

https://twitter.com/AwwwwCats/status/1100663532700516353

What did I just watch?

For once some of the comments are worth a read.

"The story of how that racist guy who says "I am not racist, I have a black friend" meet his black friend." -Josh Spigel.