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I'm half joking, I've no idea although crush is probably on their list of options. Depends which council I guess.
Howard-
http://www.ealingcycling.org.uk/p/i.html
To get an abandoned bike removed from a cycle stand, use the Ealing Council 24/7 app and choose the 'Abandoned bicycle' option. It may still be possible to report it the old way by calling the council on 020 8825 6000 and asking to speak to Envirocrime.
Note that the council no longer puts notices on bicycles warning that they will be removed, so it is not advisable to leave a bicycle in the same place for a long time. A bicycle is classed as abandoned if it meets one or more of the following criteria:
It is secured in a dangerous position (i.e. blocking the public highway)
It is secured to a council cycle rack and in an unroadworthy condition
It is secured in an inappropriate place (i.e. illegally parked or chained to street furniture) and in an unroadworthy condition.A bicycle that is defined as not roadworthy will have sustained two or more of the following:
Missing wheel
Buckled front or rear wheels
Bent forks
Seized or damaged brakes
Rusted chain or gears
Missing chain
hippy
They don't donate it to Re-Cycle or something?