Owning your own home

Sounds like you don’t have pets and live where all the territories overlap. You need to shift that by either getting an aggressive Tom cat or killing all the cats for a couple of doors in a single direction (not both) so the boundary line moves up the street a little.

Or encourage foxes into your garden by giving them a safe place under a shed or some decking. Again they will shit on the edge of their territory so make your place the centre.

We have a house cat and it's my greatest regret in life. He stares out the window and watches them stare back at him as they shit. And that's just the neighbours, the cats are far more cruel.

#fuckyeah
#actuallyowningmyownhome

It's a bug

You owe 1 billion

#computersaysno

Well done

That just upped your beer and bike budgets! Congrats!

Handy timing given they seem to have a habit of finding themselves under cars of late.

BEER!

Fucking hell, you finished boss level of first world!

What now? Retire? Whats the purpose of your life?

Release the Hound (Cat)

What now?

New career as a Financial Adviser for cyclists with drinking problems.

Nah, now you has to sell and buy bigger and better. Mortgage4eva

Exactly. Upgrade is expensive.

(10 years to go for me...)

What now? Retire? Whats the purpose of your life?

Well I was going to buy a bigger place here but since Brexit has made Britain a bit shit, that's out of the question. I would love to fuck off to Spain and live off my rental income but I'm not ready to drop out of society just yet. Life purpose: continue to annoy you lot.

I would love to fuck off to Spain

Start a bike holiday place where you ask applicants to fill a form and you chose them based on what they say.

Kinda like RCC but with hangover.

You mean drinkers with cycling problems?

How did you do it?

Running a B&B with cycling focus in Italy or Spain or something has crossed my mind many a time. I was in Spain last weekend and it was warm, there were fuck all cars, people are nice, stuff was happening. But everywhere is like that when you're on holiday.

Conditions of entry..
"If you don't drink until you puke, you have to do an extra lap of Majorca"

Only drink what you are prepared to handle tomorrow.

I meant paying it off tubbs.

Running a B&B with cycling focus in Italy or Spain or something has crossed my mind many a time

Do it.

Are you going to be the maid?

Will you dress up?

Don’t stop now...

Have a tightarse father instill 'save save save' thinking into you.
Work when you're a kid, never spend anything and earn money off savings in form of term deposit interest.
Because father is Scrooge, he has savings and uses them to pay up front to get you cheaper uni bills. Luckily siblings do not attend uni. Work nights during uni. Save.
Study something that pays well, be good at it, get job doing it, impress bosses and work full-time while finishing uni, earning decent money. Save.
Move country, spend all savings on booze. ;)
Work briefly as courier. LOL.
Go back to doing job you're good at that pays well. Earn more. Save.
Repeat.
Buy small dog kennel in London. Rejoice when it's paid off just in time for you to leave country because forrun muck ain't welcome.
There's no magic to it but if you happen to like doing something that also pays well it's a lot easier than if I was still cleaning labs or picking grapes or whatever.

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