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Cheers. I got the connector with the big rubber seal, since the guy in the shop said that it would work, even though the soil pipe end had a ring seal. I think he was right, because there was enough plain pipe below the ring seal for the connector seal to fit onto.
However... it turned out to be irrelevant, since the bodgers who put in that drain left the actual soil pipe too far away for the flexible connector to fit. To make up the distance they just added a drain connector, but with the seal removed to make the soil pipe a couple of inches higher. I was very surprised when that lifted straight out, but it meant that I could just get rid of it an push the new flexible connector into the soil pipe proper. Seems to be sorted.
This is a pipe with a ring seal socket, it could be grey or black or orange
https://www.travisperkins.co.uk/OsmaDrain-Double-Socket-Short-Radius-Bend-87-5%C2%B0-160mm-6D561/p/710073
The plain end with an existing socket is the best option, a bit of silicone grease or spray will help it fit. The other sort should fit almost everything else.
It it best to pull out the existing and see what's there and check the length you need. Block the drain with something smell and rat proof while you go shopping.