I want to get a dog but I have to work, how does everyone on broadway market do it ?

Our bitch likes to eat poo. Worst breath ever, and most appalling vomit as well.

I'm sure that's pretty bad but I can't believe that it's worse than when our dog snuffles a cat turd out of the litter tray for a snack...

Our boy is not that efficient at chewing and tends to swallow large items.

He has swallowed entire pizzles (bulls dicks) and shat them back out. The girl has then recycled this.

#shitdickbreath

As it comes in to the winter months and it's bloody dark all the time, especially when I'm out walking the pup, I'm trying to get a light up collar for my collie that is rechargeable and not crap, preferably British if poss but certainly something that will last a few years, any one have any recommendations?

We did a load of research into this and ended up buying one from https://www.leuchtie.co.uk

Not rechargeable but batteries last forever (we change ours once each winter) and no reason why you can't use rechargeable batteries.

They're very bright and secure and jo moving parts to break. Can't go wrong with one.

Ace, will look into it

They're very bright and secure and jo moving parts to break.

Can't you get Jo to stop doing that? Sounds annoying. :)

My girlfriend and I are perilously close to getting a dog together.
The problem is choosing the breed, she would like a French Bulldog and I’d prefer one of the English variety. Or should we just split the difference and get a Pug?

Decisions, decisions, stokes beard

Bulldogs and pugs are a very divisive issue among dog owners. At very least do some very deep research into their health problems and how much they may cost you in vets bills before making your mind up. Five figure bills are a very real thing.

Ultimately it's your choice of course, but I personally could not support a trade in any of those dogs. I base this on things I have read written by vets, things I have seen (pugs with eyes hanging out and frenchies dying from overheating in 21 degree weather) and the experiences of friends who have owned them (ten thousand pound bills for spinal problems and having to carry tissues to wipe their arses) . They are not for the faint of of heart or light of wallet quite apart from the ethical debate.

A couple of good pages of friendly discussion here .

Tl;dr get a Boston Terrier

I hear what you’re saying but my gf wants something that’ll get the most likes on Instagram

Get a different girlfriend?

Our upstairs neighbour has a frenchie, he’s lovely but at only 2yrs old ish he’s got a limp at the back and eye problems. He’s not the most highly-bred looking one I’ve seen either...

Then try to show your gf that Instagram likes are not more important than the wellbeing of living things.

Furious, you need one of these. Instanet gold I’m reliably informed...

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Here's another photo of Reggie, just because...

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Here's our dog's instagram account, just because. I wasn't keen when my wife set this up but its turned out to be quite a nice way of communicating with our local dog walker friends.

https://www.instagram.com/otto_whippet

Holly not enjoying the change in the weather

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He's awesome - great looking dog matey.

I wouldn't get any of those unless you want interbred unhealthy trouble. We've just got a new dog, i can't say i've gram'd her yet/have any plans to set up a dog account for her but we can't seem to walk 5 minutes without someone stopping us. I guess thats the puppy effect though which will soon wear off. She has the opposite effect to my old rescue staffy but she was the best dog ever. Just get a healthy cross breed and fuck instagram. Also if you do go for a designer brand be very very careful you aren't buying from a puppy farm and supporting a disgusting industry.
I had a lot of moral issues getting any sort of puppy over a rescue but a number of factors made it so much easier having a puppy this time around.

Yes, I'm really pleased with him and hugely looking forward to picking him up. They've sent me videos showing he has fantastic recall from distance, which is great in a young pup, plus he's house trained and crate trained to boot. Happy times!

A family I've now met twice on my walks round the local (municipal) golf course have a 16-week old female. Overfull of energy, (jumps up despite what owner shrieks), but responds to stroking by sitting, then sliding/collapsing onto side/back for more attention.

I find jumping up can be incredibly difficult to control as you need the cooperation of strangers. A cute puppy jumping up invariably elicits encouragement and "don't worry, I love dogs", when you need people to pay it no attention while you work on the issue. And it's not something all puppies grow out of.

Edit: not suggesting you're the unhelpful stranger..!

stroking by sitting, then sliding/collapsing onto side/back for more attention.

You're describing our dog! He can't pass a stranger without rolling over for belly rubs. I'm told he did it in the middle of a funeral procession once

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I probably am not helping in the on-going training as this weather,
it is more a defence mechanism to try to ensure a pair of Craghoppers
can be worn for more than one day.