This morning's commute and other commuting stories

Bah, bloody journo's union, being all "reasonable" and "helpful" and shit. Where's the entertainment in that? Why can't you just go hammer frozen shit into this bonnet with a d-lock like a normal person?

I read the comments and now I'm sad.

I've only myself to blame.

hah, i made the same mistake

He made some changes but nothing particularly major. Meh. Included the Stagecoach admission of fault.

Now can we shit on his lawn?

Go on then.

Thanks. I feel much better. Two days of bbq and beers was taking its toll.

I found them more amusing then anything else.
They're running out of things to bitch about. 'oh noz, they were in middle of roaaad' or 'on noz, where's bell/helmet/dangly alarm' etc.

Lewisham CYCLIST advocates DISGUSTING act of RETALIATION against Mail journalist.

Meh. I just haven't got time to stop Hippy today.

The lack of clarity in the article about the weird road layout (despite @Sparky being very clear in his email) seems to be compounding the anger of the 'middle of roooooad' brigade.

Still very sad.

Hah. Keep fighting the good fight, mate.

The nature of monkey was... irrepressible!

Am I going crazy or is there a northbound bus lane on Streatham High Road that wasn't there before?

Have switched up my commute so that it's a longer, but much quieter route. Usually great - this morning some total turnip blitzed across me at 30+mph, totally ignoring both me and the "give way" signs. :( He was presumably going too fast to hear the insults I hurled at him as he sped away. Grumpy for the rest of the ride.

Traing yourself to lock eyes on their plates. Report or V888 if you're feeling frisky, after all, the best revenge is served at 3am, standing over them in their bed...

Observed this morning while walkengering- furious roadie twat barrelling down the shared line around Vauxhall gyratory blowing on one of those orange whistles you get on lifejackets to make peds get out of his way. #collectiveresponsibility #givingtherestofusabadname

what an arsehole!

i'm going to go out and kick the next cyclist i see. it's about time these people were taught a lesson.

What I want to know is did the whistle work? I'd need a whole pack for each commute, by the time I've thrown one at each meat stick stepping into traffic. Happy days, whistle crew!

I saw a fella cycling in traffic yesterday on Bishopsgate with a whistle ready to blow as he RLJ'd. He looked like a right dickhead.

Well I got out of the way but let’s just say I tutted at him pretty loudly once he had gone, so I think he got the message

I'm sure he heard your eyes roll.

I seem to be getting a lot of people trying to squeeze past me on my left. Two of them had to stop just before they hit a parked cars.

Subtle movements that make them think you're unpredictable can help stop muppets doing shit like that.

Also, non-subtle (even erratic) movements which simulate mental instability can also help to ensure idiot turdburgers leave you plenty of distance.