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  • Some years ago I came to the conclusion that I was being menaced by some sort of pre-stalker. In the course of my life I had performed a particular function an estimated 40,000 times accurately and in a manner found acceptable and necessary by the majority of the population. My employers were a well respected national organisation who strived for the best possible employees, and treated them with respect - and that was reciprocated. It was an ordered and hygenic environment that was regularly monitored. So, taking all that into account what, I ask, is the probability that on every single occasion I used the urinals someone had got there before me and pissed on the floor?

  • At work, we have "half a bog roll man" (sorry it's always the men's here...not saying the ladies can't be bad, but not here) and "the phantom shitter"

    My dad has the same characters thousands of miles away. As you say, truly an international phenomenon.

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