This morning's commute and other commuting stories

penis ...... harden

Yeah, probably best not to be on the train when that happens

Does anyone know who is responsible for sweeping the CS6 superhighway .
A load of small shards of glass across both lanes roughly outside the hotel ibis close to Southwark station has been there for more then a week. Annoying.

Close pass tonight - by six big deer! Came bounding out of the woods, only just managed to stop as they weren't going to. Nearly crapped myself.

Pop quiz - a 4x4 stops at a zebra crossing in front of you, do you:

a) Wait behind them. Although you can't see any peds past the oversized vehicle, there's bound to be one and nobody is waiting to cross so it's only gonna be a couple of seconds.
b) You were scanning the road hundreds of metres ahead waiting for your opportunity to pass the car. Having seen the pedestrian step out you see your chance. Computing their trajectory enables you to filter past on the correct side of the car at speed.
c) You are travelling at 15kmph - already on the limit of your fitness, handling abilities and the stopping distance of your poorly maintained bike. No way are you slowing down like the stupid car in front, what possible reason could they have for doing that anyway? You pick a side of the car at random, flop your bike in that direction without looking over your shoulder and hope for the best.

How did you fare:
a) Well done, you win a commuter medal and live to ride home.
b) Congratulations, you are a road warrior, mamils in hi-viz want to be you.
c) Commiserations, you are every nodder on my commute.

15kmph

Rep 15,000 mph!

ThrustSSFG

hehe

Genuine lol.

By my (very limited) calculations, at that speed you are effectively a tomahawk cruise missile. You hit the car killing a few people, cause moderate property damage and disrupt traffic in the area for a couple of weeks.

Love that car.

Highbury Corner is functional again, and Moorgate as well. Good times.

have they repaved moorgate yet? some parts feel like it's what it would have been like riding around london during the height of the blitz.

I wouldn't say so, but I can get through both ways without walking or breaking the law and that's enough for me :)

Stacked it trying to hop onto a curb too quickly this morning (stupid actions result in stupid consequences). Cyclist rode past a moment later when I was still on the ground, stared at me and just kept going. We're both c*nts

It was @rpm. If you weren't conscious he would've had your wallet.

n00bs. Lots of subtweeting at my fellow commuters this morning "ooh guess what YOU got for Christmas? Shame you're riding like a [key change] CUUUUNT!".

Cycling home along Kirkstall Road yesterday. It's always completely chocker & cars are backed up all the way up the road, & with the bus/bike lane as it is, anyone wanting to turn left has to wait until the end of the road. Obviously, this leads to drivers pulling out as soon as they possibly can, even when traffic isn't moving because of the lights.

Van driver yesterday pulls to turn left almost right into me (thankfully I managed to swerve) as I'm riding back hugging the right of the bus/bike lane to get to the ASL to continue straight. Manage to get the attention of the driver at the line & he gives me the dumbest look & insists that he checked his mirrors multiple times. Fat chance. I hope the person in the passenger's seat tells me how close he came to knocking me off, obviously not having looked at all. Frustrating!

Brixton Road has more roadworks today?! It never ends...

Two punctures in a row on my way to work today in Stamford Hill.
Man these Continental GP 4000 do have the grip but aren't the best for commuting

They're 200g tyres. They're not designed for commuting

Why was the top of Horseferry Rd closed today? Lots of polis about by the look of it.

But think of all that time saved!

"Two punctures in a row on my way to work"

Oh.

Prince Harry again?

Only if he's working for the gas...

Last night I witnessed a driver pull into a parking space then reverse straight into the car behind him. When he got out of the car his excuse was that there hadn't been any warning beeps that he was close.
Since he was driving a white Audi A3, I didn't have to waste time being surprised.

Saw someone with no apparent rear brake, no disc brake and a standard geared hybrid bike riding along. Didn't appear to be a hub brake either?? How do they stop?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RikrsTLYylk