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Yeah i brush my suede wheel and it's lasted really well but i rarely touch it with bare hands
Bare hands is the killer with suede steering wheels, i'm not totally sure why but i think it's just the dirt / sweat / detritus off your hands that flattens the pile off. I cleaned one once with muc off and a microfibre cloth and it came up really well once i'd cleaned all the dead skin off it
Momo now have a steering wheel online customiser too, like NikeID for Steering wheels
https://www.momo.com/en-us/products/custom-steering-wheels-us/
I think you're right, I'd avoid a suede rim because it only took 6 months of irregular driving for mine to go manky AF. I'm thinking about getting a Nardi 330mm in leather to replace my OMP 300mm in suede.