£100m – red road paint
£100m – white road paint
£100m – blue road paint
£50m – gay cure research
£5m – reinforced marching shoes
£2m – 50-foot statue of Ian Paisley (to be sited at the top of Garvaghy Road)
£49.95m – more flegs
£50m – pregnancy test kits (for use at Larne and Aldergrove to stop the little sluts escaping)
£50k – a wee café for the lad the boss’s wife is schtupping
The rest – more flegs
ha ha - brilliant! stollen!