General Election June 2017

'Crushing' might be more apt than defeating.

It was pitched as a marginal and a top Lib Dem target, but Zeichner has won a majority.

'All of my family ... and my wife'

Slightly odd turn of phrase from JBC?

A former Blairite (the guy behind him looking miserable during his speech) ran against him, saying he was unelectable. He has just been elected for the 9th (I think) time. Foster got 600 votes.

Does May have the humility to actually stand down?

There's some fake news being reported that Corbyn's been elected somewhere. This is metaphysically impossible. I look forward to him losing his deposit later tonight.

Understood, but the number of people I've spoken to who still parrot back 'unelectable' at the first mention of Corbyn is staggering.

Looks like May stopped off at a mortician on the way to her count.

Usual place then

Labour to win Canterbury? Some night.

Salmond rumoured to have lost.

FUCK Dagenham and Rainham has gone to the Tories

Fucking inverse midas touch over here, sorry guys

Corbyn calls on May to resign. Love it.

Balls. 2hrs till alarm.

Fuck it off and go to the pub. I am.

Did you yell CORBO! loud enough?

(Well done for getting out there. More than most of us).

Hold on. I'm reading elsewhere Jon Cruddas has won it. Chaos.

....I want the bike back. And the coffee :)

Too soon - drama.

Labour take Canterbury. Held by Tories since 1918.

Ha. Ukip's lost Clacton. There's a surprise...

Clearly, we need a recount.

Corbyn calling for May to step down!

May perpetually looks like someone's wedged a shite in her nose.

Don't do anything - it'll collapse the waveform.

Britain Elects‏ @britainelects 7m7 minutes ago

Conservative GAIN Dagenham & Rainham from Labour.

LBC Breaking‏Verified account
@lbcbreaking

Conservatives gain Dagenham and Rainham from Labour

LBC Breaking‏Verified account
@lbcbreaking

Correction: Labour hold Dagenham and Rainham

I don't know what to believe!

Wins all round - bike back to @tommmmmmm and coffee for days