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dancing james
You'll always have the fear - after seven years as a freelancer, I still get the fear - so in the end, you just have to accept that the fear will always be there and get on with things.
Last time I was on the forum properly, I'd just been made redundant, had ended a long-term relationship and was fighting my old employers in an Employment Tribunal. In the years that followed I did a ton of personal photography work, which culminated in me deciding at the last minute to join my best friend and sleep in the back of his van while shooting him riding bikes in the Alps. That got me working with Cyclist, who I've worked for over the past three years, as well as some other cool people. Last year I started writing as well, and had a piece in the Ride Journal, before I started working for Tinkoff, and then this season, doing PR for Sagan.
I earnt a really decent salary when I had my desk job - about four times as much as I do now - but I'm so, so much happier now, even during the quiet times when I'm panicking about the amount of work coming in. I miss not owning my own home, and hate that I can't afford to do the things I want to do, but what's the alternative? I'd be working more than 40hr weeks and I'd never be able to do anything else - 50 weeks a year so I can go on holiday for two weeks? Fuck that.
In the end, nobody gives a shit about you, so you may as well do something you love, or at least helps you pay the bills so you can do the things you do love more. Long time dead and everything...