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  • I hope that the next time she goes paddling in the sea a large wave surprises her and knocks her over and that in the confusion sand gets into the bottom of her swimmers and thence into her vagina where it causes immense irritation so much so that she doesn't notice the next wave which again knocks her over and into a rip current that drags her out to sea where she is rescued by a rubber dingy crammed with illegal migrants who save her but when she realises what they are and despite the self destructiveness of the action she tries to sink the boat and as she does so a naval ship saves them all from drowning but she is arrested for attempted murder and sentenced to life in prison where she becomes the prison wife of a large yet unattractive Muslim woman and disappears into obscurity.

  • I hope that the next time she goes paddling in the sea a large wave surprises her and knocks her over and that in the confusion sand gets into the bottom of her swimmers and thence into her vagina where it causes immense irritation so much so that she doesn't notice the next wave which again knocks her over and into a rip current that drags her out to sea where she is rescued by a rubber dingy crammed with illegal migrants who save her but when she realises what they are and despite the self destructiveness of the action she tries to sink the boat and as she does so a naval ship saves them all from drowning but she is arrested for attempted murder and sentenced to life in prison where she becomes the prison wife of a large yet unattractive Muslim woman and disappears into obscurity.

    I hope she forgets what a comma is and is thenceforth forever at war with her sub-editors.

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