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Am I right to assume that we're on the same page regarding most things aside from believing that he mislead people into thinking there's multiplayer in NMS?
Pretty much. I've not seen much evidence for direct misleading, more like not being 100% clear when a mic is shoved in your face and / or being broadcast live in front of a million people. Which I think is understandable.
The folks you refer to as Gamers exist in every following of anything that is produced these days. Whether it's games, films, music, whatever. There'll always be a bunch of over-opinionated know-it-alls critising and putting down every aspect of it they can find.
It's a mistake to lump those who have negative opinions on the piece in question in with people like that.
Scope creep is perfectly natural and happens all the time, I understand that. Not hitting stretch targets is normal, and to be expected, by definition.
Like you say, the guy running the project often doesn't get the technical nuances of what's going on and can say something that's misleading and/or incorrect. Sean Murphy is not one of those people however. Being an ex-developer & technical lead for previous games kind of rules him out of that.
I'm not saying it's a conspiracy either, I'll hold my hand up and admit to feeling that he purposely dodged giving a direct answer to questions regarding multiplayer in order to keep the hype-train rolling though.
People who say the "hate" Sean Murray are, I agree, quite OTT. And it's not behaviour that should in any way be condoned.
I don't understand why people who haven't bought the game can't have negative feelings about it though.
Am I right to assume that we're on the same page regarding most things aside from believing that he mislead people into thinking there's multiplayer in NMS?