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Sounds like a disaster that is going to cause resentment(?). I appear to be late to comment but hopefully there are some new bits in here...
I understand the dads perspective but if you are going to be named on the mortgage then I don't agree with fobbing you off as a 'renter'. If you end up in negative equity and split up, is the dad happy to accept any loss too? Doubtful!
We have calculated the value of our place as a % value taking into account our significantly different deposits. This way, if we separate, we take a % which covers us for a rise or fall in value. This is written down and with the land registry, IIRC.
You'll want to look at Tenants in common where you can declare a % value. You may then also choose to have your solicitor provide a Deed of Trust which outlines what happens in certain events.
On a side note, you're in a relationship, I trust you'll probably end up with joint accounts and not argue over who earns more (nor care) so why should it matter with where you live.
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spinnnout
Im looking for some advice that hopefully some of you have had a similar situation too?
the tl;dr is - GF has a large(ish) deposit (~15%) ready to buy a house in the next 12 months or so. I have basically nothing to contribute towards a deposit (< 5k) but she likely needs me on the mortgage as my salary is more than double hers and hers is relatively low, for the price of housing in London.
We haven't really talked about the gritty details massively but her Dad (who over the years has contributed massively to the deposit) is keen for the house to be 'hers' not 'ours', and wants more of a me 'paying rent' situation.