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  • I was in a pub with a pizza menu last night. A notable entry:

    The Lorry Driver: Soft Italian Cheese, Italian Sausage, Chips and Mayonnaise.

    I was not (that) tempted.

  • that 'end of evening snack' could be improved if the Italian sausage was replaced with doner meat and chilli shosh, and complimentary jagerbomb

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