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@brokenbetty
We had live acts but between and after we used an ipad and an app called Limitlist. Basically you select all the songs you might want to hear and tag them all by whatever classification makes sense to you. Then you build a playlist not by specific song but by classification. When you play the playlist, it picks 3 songs that fit the classification and lets people vote from them for the next song. So by selecting the playlist based on classification you set the overall pace and tone, but leave an element that guests control on the night. Ok it's not a dj but it's more flexible than a playlist. Plus when someone votes that app takes their photo...
the other thing we did was a silent disco (our venue had a midnight noise curfew). It worked really well as people could take the headphones off to chill and put them on to dance. Also one of our most snooty muso friends nearly died laughing watching us all sing Gay Bar to music he couldn't hear...