Football

How to fit in at Fulham

1. Wear red trousers
   
2. Know nothing whatsoever about football
   
3. Keep checking the rugby scores
   
4. Learn their one song: "There's only one F in Fulham"
   
5. Moan nostagicly about the glory days of Fayhed
   
6. Ask where the Michael Jackson statue is.
   
7. Be ready to run on the pitch and moon the opposition supporters*
   
8. Bring a packed lunch
   
9. Ask for David Hamilton's autograph
   
10. Wear a half and half scarf.
    
    

*Only necessary in the highly unlikely event of a Fulham win.