This morning's commute and other commuting stories

I have a couple of pairs of rugby shorts, they were the cheapest ones in the tk maxx active wear sale. They seem to work fine as shorts.

I didn't realise I was making enemies.

He nearly ran into me coming around a blind corner on the footpath, ie I was walking, at a quick speed, didn't even slow down to enter the road. I

And they have pockets to keep your hands warm (unless it's rugby league, in which case they are more shiny and aero?)...

Presumably they were England RWC 2015 shorts if they were cheap?

dildo on a motorbike

Its at times like this I wish I could draw.

"I have a blind spot you know!"

Funny thing, that. My driver instructor used to always be all like, "check your blind spot" before I did anything that might affect another road user.

It's almost as though one's blind spot is only a blind spot if you don't bother to turn your head.

I think I can see some pixels.

So my waterproof rainpants don't seem to be waterproof after all.
Sat in my first meeting today, positively looking as if I had pissed myself.

Need new rainwear.

Are you positive you hadn't pissed yourself?

I saw some city boy in full suit and tie standing in the ASL at Blackfriars this morning on one of them electric mono wheel things.

I could not helping proper belly laughing as he stood there all nonchalant, hands in pockets. The lights changed, he leaned forward and slowly moved away and off up the bridge..

Need new rainwear.

https://www.lfgss.com/conversations/274845/ ??

Ha, actually I would like a product now, not sometime in the future. ;)

Rugby socks. Just NO. Rugby socks pulled up with running shoes. FUCK NO.

Board shorts? On a road bike? With pulled up rugby socks? And blue Nike running shoes? And a tennis racket poking out of the edges of your HUMP bag cover? How many sports are you attempting at once?

Any clothing that tells me what university you went to. Fuck off.

This is just a list of things people wear in Clapham isn't it?

What if I'm poor and those are the only clothes I have, you horrible tory?

You should've studied a useful subject.

This is LFGSS mate. Please buy the most expensive clothing you can find on an American website and tell us all about your experiences avoiding paying import duty.

No pockets and not shiny :( They are quite hard wearing and flexible though. Lovely shorts really, would recommend.

Today has been a twatfest; start off with a van driving fucktard who thinks it's fun to drive at me on New Malden roundabout, then tries a swerve at me, intersperse with some premier wankface driving from various other dipshits and finish with some dicksplashes in a hot hatch driving up my ares on a narrow road with no passing room on the way home. Is it the weather that's made everyone drive so shit?

You should've studied a useful subject.

Maybe an MBA would help your career?

Fucking hell, I really need to start videoing my commutes. Just had a beep beep - close pass - swerve across on me. Caught up to the hideous excuse for a human at the next lights, obviously.
"You in a rush mate?"
"Yeah I am as it happens, you were riding in the middle of the road"
Normal explanation ensues, plus extra about how he was going over the fucking speed limit, at which point
"Why are you swearing at me?"
"Because you put me in a life threatening situation"
"Yeah but you should learn to cycle, you we in the middle of the road" etc etc
At which point I lost my rag and called him all the swears I knew.
He then proceeded to overtake a car ahead of him that was signalling right.

I really don't understand how people like this keep their licenses.

Fuck you london/10

I really don't understand how people like this keep their licenses.

Because the police are severely underfunded.

Punishment pass followed by standing at back of very long queue. Attempted to wheelie past in triumph but just looked like I couldn't ride a bike very well.

(Karma for him being a dick and karma for me being smug)/10

Riding with a trailer, not as bad as I was thinking it would be.

Lately I've been trying to avoid swearing in these kind of interactions. So instead I ended up sounding like a schoolmaster as I firmly shouted "do NOT do that again" - not sure which is worse.

One of the most joyous things about being in my forties is calling van drivers and taxi drivers "son". "Look son, you're a professional driver. You know better than that"