• Dramatis Personae

    1. BRAD - a moddish Belgian sideburn model
    2. CHRIS - a scouse time trial specialist
    3. ANDREW - an American rookie. Future GT contender?
    4. BERYL - Royal Mail employee

    Setting: SORTING OFFICE. INT. DAY.

    BRAD: I'm so glad this sorting office provides ample cylcle parking (hums A Town Called Malice)

    CHRIS: You said it, Wiggo. I hope my parcel's here.

    BRAD: What did you order?

    CHRIS: [laughing] A new aero helmet!

    BRAD: As if you need one!

    CHRIS: Oh stop it

    [they embrace]

    BERYL: Have you got any ID?

    CHRIS: Oh my gosh! I forgot my wallet!

    ANDREW: DOUCHEBAGS! [he strikes BRAD with an inner tube]

    END SCENE.

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