Crap 'Buzzwords'

Sure it wasn't 'huddle'? Or maybe she heard someone elsae say 'cuddle' when they actually said 'huddle', and reckoned it must be a thing now.

I discovered yesterday that I'm "Holding the pen" on a particular bit of work.

Defo cuddle.
He thinks it's witty or irreverent.

"Come on Willis, let's have a little cuddle about X issue before this meeting"

He also wears funny ties.

New CEO told us we would all have to 'put in some hard yards' the other day.

He also wears funny ties.

Kill him. In the face with fire.

Just reply with "well, lets get the key players together for an orgy and well all discuss X issue together" should weird em out.

Why can't costs, or whatever, just rocket why do they skyrocket nowadays?

Inflation, innit?

'Like'

I want to connect an electro shock collar to voice activated technology to cure my daughter of this affliction.

'In terms of'

Think before you open your mouth so you don't need meaningless shite to connect your sentence.

holding the pen is a bit wank isn't it

We have "Mr Chedder" instead of "holding the pen" as in being "le fromage grand". A harmless thing that has got more stupid as time goes by.

I can't be the first to post 'selfie' can I?

Instant death would be too lenient for utterers of this nightmare.

My daughter "kind of like liked" something the other day. I despair.

... basis ...

For example : On a daily basis
Just say daily. 1 word instead of 4.

Or, if you really must be verbose, say each day

I feel better now.

Has bullshit bingo been mentioned?
Stick all these buzzwords in a random matrix, print out and give to colleagues pre-meeting.
Attend meeting, bingo rules apply and when anyone gets a line, stand up & shout 'bullshit!'

Dates back to my Rolls-Royce days, 2008.

Dates back to before cars were invented

aero engines

but ok

Backfill.. Has Backfill come up yet?

sorry if I missed something.

As in 'moving on we plan to backfill the rol of..'

It just means fill right?

yep..

"Breakout area"

Thanks to Screenwipe for reminding me

I have recently decided to get annoyed with any company that says 'passionate about' when referring to the shit the are trying to peddle. Turns out there are loads and I'm annoyed most of the time.

I'm currently boycotting any eating establishment with an 'ethos.'