• Politely informed a gentleman on Blackfriars Bridge last night that his lights were on the wrong way round.

    BB: What you want is red at the back, white at the front.
    Gentleman: I'VE GOT LIGHTS
    BB: Yes I can see that. But they're the wrong way round.
    G: Wot, srsly?
    BB: Yes. See all these cars and other bikes with red at the back and white at the front?
    G: (Slightly sheepish) Um OK, thanks mate.

  • Had a similar conversation with some bloke near Finsbury Park, his closing statement was "yeah, but I want to be a bit different"; I still haven't come up with a reasonable response to that.

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