Football

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/28868727

Vargas to QPR. Interesting signing, I'm suprised Napoli have loaned him out to a Premiership side rather than a club in Spain which might suit his game better.

Fellani and Hernandez to Spurs? Please. No. Fuck. No.

Fellaini won't pass a medical with his foot in a brace... But yes please take our rubbish out.

I preferred it when the shit was flowing the other way..

This from the < corny mode > Guardian rumour page < /corny mode > made me laugh:

In other winger news, Jordan Ibe is set to leave Anfield. Liverpool have a proud tradition of developing their own players, producing a grand total of 0 first team regulars since Michael Owen broke through in 1998. Nowadays, though, youth development’s Brendan Rodgers magnanimously allows other clubs to test themselves by allocating them the difficult bits.

Fellani and Hernandez to Spurs? Please. No. Fuck. No.

hernandez as a change of pace striker, I can see. Fellaini's too similar to what we have in midfield, so no need..
Is the fact that Nani has headed off out the old trafford door, and we're being linked to these two mean the Van Gaal broom is in full effect? Sweeping out the unwanted bits of player tat. Surprised Cleverley is getting a new contract though. But Van Gaal does know what a good young player looks like, so he must see something...

Phil Neville trying hard to lose the 'boring' tag given after the WC.

Must be taking lessons somewhere.

Fellaini is another average midfielder. About the right level for Everton/Spuds/current ManU.

If you do fuck all but score, you better be scoring 30 goals a season. Hernandez wont so he's little use.

Phil Neville trying hard to lose the 'boring' tag given after the WC.
Must be taking lessons somewhere.

The LFGSS football thread?

Top trolling by Daniel Harris, Britain's worst sports journalist.

However, can you tell me how many other premier league sides had at least three academy graduates make over 20 league appearances for them last season?

I don't think that the Rumour page is supposed to be serious journalism. Just recycling other papers rumours with tongue in cheek.

The problem with Harris that he aims for the prose style of Barney Ronay, but the result is akin to a random sentence generator.

Before @Markyboy gets there first: BARNEY RONAY IS A FUCKING IDIOT.

I like Barney Ronay.

Is Barney Ronay Corny's ghost writer?

Does Barney Ronay write for the Guardian?

It appears he does.

Ronay used to be funny, but I think the Guardian's copy/sub editors have stopped bothering to reign him in and now his style of writing has moved from "idiosyncratic" to "Eh?"

Is Barney Ronay Corny's ghost writer?

he goes well too far off piste for that job...
but some of his descriptions of players and actions are top notch..

Everton, Southampton, Aston Villa, Cardiff, Arsenal, Manchester United, Newcastle (I think)...

I haven't researched it but I'm pretty sure on those.

Fulham. Oh dear.

Football manager is racist, homophobic, sexist storm shocker.

Mo Fayed's exit strategy appears to be a stroke of genius.

They shouldn't have taken that Michael Jackson statue. #hindsight

god, the ballotelli to liverpool rumours are surfacing again
if we must a loan but don't spend good money on him ffs

Balotelli will enjoy bonfire night in Liverpool, it lasts about three months.

@dicki, still don't know why you don't just take Eto'o on a years rental and put the ground work into getting hold of another striker whilst he's around... He'll score you 10-20 a season...

on another note alvaro morata that bright young striker from real madrid who spurs tried to get as a makeweight in the bale deal has gone to juventus, suppose they had to make space for james rodriguez, but there are players to be had with them..

also wondering who is going to take petr cech off chelsea's hands before the transfer window closes?