LOL .. well, not much to say. You've apparently already made up your mind.
All I can reply is that I have never posted to this website as anyone else. But you won't believe that, so shrug...
As for the rest of your rant, rather amusing, I have to say. Especially the 'teenage' bit, because unless you're a lot older than you sound, I (born in 1967) am probably twenty years older than you... if not double your age.
And calling me 'stupid' just makes you look silly. I think that with four university degrees so far, I've done my bit to prove that I'm not that thick.
Although like everyone else, I can be at times.
Anyway, all good fun. My arse (or to be more precise, my perineum) is utter agony this evening, so I'm entrusting my commute to South Eastern tomorrow. That should be fun.
Need a more comfortable saddle.