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  • He graded his own books.

    I have graded my separate works from A to D. The grades I hand out to myself do not place me in literary history. I am comparing myself with myself. Thus can I give myself an A-plus for Cat’s Crade, while knowing that there was a writer named William Shakespeare. The report card is chronological, so you can plot my rise and fall on graph paper, if you like:

    Player Piano B
    The Sirens of Titan A
    Mother Night A
    Cat’s Cradle A-plus
    God Bless You, Mr. Rosewater A
    Slaughterhouse-Five A-plus
    Welcome to the Monkey House B-minus
    Happy Birthday, Wanda June D
    Breakfast of Champions C
    Wampeters, Foma & Grandfalloons C
    Slapstick D
    Jailbird A
    Palm Sunday C

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