Take the stem out, push the expander wedge up until it just touches the stem; hold it there and tighten the top nut slowly so you just start to feel resistance. Then you know the wedge has started to 'bite' the inside of the stem, but not enough to expand it so it won't fit in the head tube. Give it a good coat of grease and slide it in, then you can tighten enough to set the stem straight, but not fully tight. Slightly loosen the locknut on the headset to relieve pressure on the bearings, fully tighten stem bolt then tighten locknut, holding the top nut with a headset spanner so you don't rotate it and squish the bearings ....
Take the stem out, push the expander wedge up until it just touches the stem; hold it there and tighten the top nut slowly so you just start to feel resistance. Then you know the wedge has started to 'bite' the inside of the stem, but not enough to expand it so it won't fit in the head tube. Give it a good coat of grease and slide it in, then you can tighten enough to set the stem straight, but not fully tight. Slightly loosen the locknut on the headset to relieve pressure on the bearings, fully tighten stem bolt then tighten locknut, holding the top nut with a headset spanner so you don't rotate it and squish the bearings ....