What is a hipster? Look at this fucking hipster...

Someone needs to teach one of the barmen in my local how to pull a Hoegaarden. At this rate that person will have to be me. Each time I have to ask him to top my pint up, once the head has stopped being able to be measured in acres. I'd rather be barred than drink his first offer.

Bastard was at it again not an hour ago. First pint pulled by barman A, or 'him with deftness of touch', arrived full of satisfaction. Good start. Then barman X, or 'exhibit A' of previous post, caught my eye as I tried to divert it when I needed replenishment, so the duty fell to him.

Of course I had to return it with an ever polite request for a top-up, to which he laughed and replied 'Same as always, eh?'. Yes pal. Every stinking time. Quit the fancy shite and pour me a full pint without shaking the glass like you've been electrocuted. Beer settles better that way, as does my rage.