Surprise it's a BMW

Quite a chilly one this morning wasn’t it. I was at the traffic lights on Queensbridge road heading towards Hackney Rd, the ones next to LMNT, right at the front. The lights went green, I pulled away. A bus over took then indicated left to pull into a bus stop ahead, I looked over my right shoulder to check the traffic coming up behind me so I can move out and round the bus ahead. In the split second it took me to look a BMW passed me, as I looked back, SURPRISE!! it had stopped dead in front of me!! all I could do was collide with its boot. Thrown up in the air I landed on the ground! Amazed and slightly shocked I got up and realised I wasn’t hurt. The driver was already out asking if I was OK. I was fine, I was lucky. In my mind most cars don’t overtake cyclists on top of the junction they want to turn left into, when they do they normally just turn in and move on not stop dead in the centre of the road. If you see a grey BMW estate with a scratch on the boot around Hackney and London fields, give her a wave.

If you see a grey BMW estate with a scratch on the boot around Hackney and London fields, give her a hoof in the foo-foo.

fixed

Shabby dude, Got your text this morning but didn't have your number in my phone.
Glad you're okay.

A hoof in the foo-foo?

That is the single funniest thing I've heard in ages. Top marks and expect to hear it repeated all weekend.

A hoof in the foo-foo?

Needs one of these:

]Hoof away my friend, by the size of her she'd be in the Cougar category

Oh and she invited me in for a cup of Tea. I declined of course. silly fucking mare....

It's hilarious. Even BMW themselves have caught on to the fact that BMW drivers are generally considered to be cunts.

Their recent marketing material is full of photos where you can't actually see a driver at all.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/motoring/car-manufacturers/bmw/10380377/BMW-4-Series-Convertible-on-sale-in-March.html

More driver-less photos in this link:
http://www.egmcartech.com/2013/10/14/bmw-reveals-the-3-series-drop-top-successor-the-all-new-2014-4-series-convertible/2014-bmw-4-series-convertible-43/

LH drive innit.

erm... you can see the driver. he is driving the car.

bloody cyclists, shouldn't be on the road - can't even see if a car has a driver in it or not

Driver has jumped out as (if you look top right of the photo) there's Ming's raygun about to melt german precision engineering to death - A proper hoof to the fu fu!

It's not April first yet^

EDIT: I just saw the year on it. I'm still an idiot, a late one at that.

Suprise, its a BMW. Crunch.

Lookout for a blue metallic BMW on Webber Street.

^ How did you get a lizard to sit on your shoulder for that x-ray???

NHS standards are dropping.

Aaaaaaaaand repped

The copy on that BMW ad is brilliant.

It's a car gym, but not as we know it

..and this from a few years back. Can't fault BMW for not knowing their market

I do love my BMW.... I don't get cut up in it by other drivers and then only to be told that I deserve it for not paying road tax!

So as to f#ck people's sh#t up, I am super courteous/careful on the odd occasion I drive.... I even rarely overtake cyclists!

I even worked out that you can switch on the car heating from inside the house before you get in it! Oh the contrast to cycling in on my beloved & decrepid Bob Jackson

BMW drivers moved to Audi's a few years back anyway. Apparently they had heard that BMWs were driven by cunts and didn't realise they were those cunts Self awareness not a strong point.

"all cyclists are smug, self satisfied hippies"

etc...

"some cyclists are smug, self satisfied BMW drivers"

etc...

Corrected

Jeremy Vine got clipped by one this morning:
https://vine.co/v/MOFbruiBqLQ

Jeremy 'Vine'